If you’ve found your way to this page, it means you’re dealing with an entrenched pattern in your family and despite concerted use of the Hand in Hand Listening Tools things don’t seem to be shifting.
I’ve found SleepTalk can act like a catalyst and help move you passed that stuck place.
What is SleepTalk?
The SleepTalk process is a simple yet powerful way of talking to your child whilst they sleep that allows their subconscious mind to take in a more supportive belief structure. It gently enhances a child’s sense of feeling loved, lovable and worthwhile. With a supportive belief structure in place, you’ll witness significant changes your child’s behaviour. They’ll become more relaxed and easy going and better able to handle life’s ups and downs.
How Does it Work?
Despite our best efforts, our children might have experienced things which have left deep hurts buried inside. Sometimes these feelings are so ingrained that they can have a very hard time feeling safe at all. This can make it hard for you to get traction with the Hand in Hand Listening Tools. If your child’s belief structure is based largely on fear or lack of confidence, or a feeling of rejection or inadequacy, the decisions made by their conscious mind will reflect those beliefs.
It’s difficult for children to deal confidently with issues in their life if at a core level they feel anxious, fearful, unhappy or believe they are unloved or unlovable. Instead they’ll display high levels of anxiety, clinginess, aggression or rigid behaviour patterns. If this sounds like your child, it’s not your fault! You can’t control everything that happens to your child or your family, and you can’t control how events land in your child’s mind. Luckily you can help your child heal and build supportive beliefs.
SleepTalk works by targeting deep seated beliefs and opens up a child’s mind so they can take in all the connection and listening you are offering them through using the Hand in Hand Listening Tools. It offers a child new supportive beliefs to help them feel loved, lovable and worthwhile. This helps them be more relaxed and easy-going.
My oldest child was 5-years-old when my second child was born. I was feeling confident as a parent and figuring I’d handle our new baby well. As an experienced Hand in Hand Instructor I had powerful strategies, insights and hours and hours of time clocked up listening to other parents. The Listening Tools helped enormously but by the time my baby was 6-months old, my oldest child was becoming increasingly tight and rigid in his behaviour. The Listening Tools just about keep us afloat, but I didn’t seem to be able to shift my son’s increasingly entrenched behaviour patterns. Someone mentioned SleepTalk and I though I’d try it out.
After two week of using SleepTalk I began to see little changes in my son. Like he was happy first thing in the morning rather than grumpy, he could play next to me whilst I fed his baby brother wihout lashing out. The improvement continued and I was amazed and relieved.
In 2012 I trained with Joane Goulding, the Founder of SleepTalk, and have since supported over 20 families through the process. I started out slowly supporting friends. Then in 2016, I opened my doors to parents who’d been working with me and were facing entrenched behaviour patterns. Whilst Hand in Hand Parenting is my main modality, I’ve been blown away by the way SleepTalk brings huge shifts in family dynamics. I’m grateful to have ongoing support directly from Joane Goulding.
What Do You Do?
Every night you speak to your child whilst they sleep in a specific way using a script that takes 2 to 3 minutes.
You do this for a minimum of 3-months. Often that is enough but sometimes more is needed.
There are three levels: Foundation, Level 2 and Level 3. The vast majority of children only need the Foundation stage.
The Foundation level uses a general statement to make sure your child feels loved and lovable, is open to feeling happy and can accept change.
Level-2 gives more specific suggestions.
Level-3 looks at psycho-nutrition to help deal with any lingering behaviour patterns.
After completing the SleepTalk process, you keep the supportive beliefs in place by using the Foundation script with your child once a week.
How Does The Consultation Package Work?
The process lasts 3-months and the consultation package includes:
Initial 90-minute Consultation - We take a base level assessment of where your child is now. I explain the SleepTalk process, give you the Foundation script and show you how to use it. We’ll discuss the changes you might see, how to record them and I’ll answer any questions you have.
Following Day 10-minute check-in - I’ll check in with you by phone the next day to see how the first night went and answer your questions.
10 x Weekly 10-minute check-ins - We’ll connect by phone or Voxer for a weekly check-in. This gives you much needed accountability to keep using the SleepTalk week-in, week-out. As easy as it is to do, there’s a way by which it’s hard to keep it up without support.
What I love most about the weekly check-ins, is that you can also use it to:
- get feedback on any parenting issues you’re facing that week
- get some one-way Listening Time
- set yourself small manageable parenting goals
This is such a gentle way of keeping you using all the Hand in Hand Listening Tools or any other strategies you want to use to make your family life go more smoothly.
45-minute Evaluation Consultation - When the SleepTalk process looks like it’s taken hold, usually by 12 weeks, we meet to take stock of the changes in your child’s behaviour. In the vast majority of cases this is all that’s needed. Sometimes a child will need a more specific SleepTalk script and we’ll discuss moving to Level 2.
Here’s what Jane, mother of one girl, had to say about SleepTalk…
”Before we consulted with Rachel we were struggling with our daughter, especially around getting her to sleep, which was time consuming and draining. We’d already seen a Sleep Consultant and she’d suggested Hand in Hand Parenting.
I first came across Rachel, when she responded to a question of mine that I’d posted on a Hand in Hand forum. Her response really struck me, as it was so caring and supportive, which led me to consult with her. After using all the Listening Tools for a several months and not seeing much change, Rachel suggested SleepTalk.
Since doing SleepTalk we’ve seen great improvements in getting our daughter to sleep and with her behaviour in general, and it hasn’t been draining. My daughter’s changed a lot. She’s easier to get along with, her emotions are less extreme, and I’m less exhausted. Our relationship has improved a lot, I feel less drained and more connected.
I’d highly recommend doing SleepTalk with Rachel. The weekly check-ins were supportive, she’s understanding, a great listener, and is very gentle.”
Want to know more?
Joane Goulding, the founder of SleepTalk, has a wealth of information on her website.